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Big Blue

The image above is the reflection found last night after we filled up our pool.

We have been grappling with a name: "Oasis"... "Serenity"..."Paradise"...we wanted something simple, a label that evoked so many things all at once. "The Content" was a breakfast suggestion that offers duality depending on your pronunciation. What word(s) would capture our vision? It will come, eventually.

Part of our impetus to explore this adventure (huge body of cold water in our garden October 14, 2018) is simple and immediate remedy to discomfort. (The other part is FUN!) We wanted something to help us "shake off the cobwebs", create instant 'different' and possibly help us reroute if we find ourselves in destructive pattern.

I am well versed in the notion of "change your mind" and if anyone has ever tried it, REALLY, you know how challenging it can be. Like, infuriatingly so. What I am getting at is something close to ruminating, that incessant cycle of negative thinking that drags us down down down. It can deliver anxiety, panic and absolute fear, along with many other 'icky' emotions.

My kids get swallowed up fast by their negative thinking and blame patterns. My explanation/rational tutorial (delivered in loving, calm, patient voice) falls short. They get so stuck in their thinking almost nothing will pull them out. Last year, with a smaller pool, I picked each of them up (one after the other) and threw them into the frigid water fully clothed. In that instant, okay maybe four, they were shocked, delighted, mortified and excited. We were able to break out of our 'stuck' and create a different experience instantaneously.

Amazing, right?

I had a dream last night that I was standing on my hands with ease. In remembering I can feel my glee and my power. It is a perfect representation for some of my life moments, those places where I am triggered and inevitably stuck. I want to turn myself upside down and shake it off. In the past, I have tried going for a walk and changing my scenery. Moving body is good remedy. Involving a friend is also a wonderful solution. In that situation, I start with rehashing the drama and then try to manipulate my pal to agree with my blame cycle. (What are friends for?) So not really sure that is my BEST approach.

I love cold water. I am my mother's daughter. We are bay swimmers thanks to her and although I support hottubin, fully, my true passion lies in the chill of the ocean. So we are not heating this lovely body of water nestled in my garden. We are swimmers at any time of day and now we can do it in our back yard. Absolutely Ecstatic.

We support group effort. It does not always work, but we are committed. When necessary we hold hands and run...or we scream loud and jump...ticklemania and collective endeavor help us resist the gloomy spiral. I can hear these words in a moment of being triggered: "Let's jump in the pool and talk about it when we get out." ;-)

We already practice often: "Let's discuss it in the hot tub". I was quite delighted when those words fell out of my twelve year old's mouth.

Repetition and pattern are not creative. They are redundant. I will position myself to feel opportunity when something challenges me. And my newest tool will be BIG BLUE. My gift to self and family, a place for us to unravel with BRISK.

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